NICU Strong: How to Help Your NICU Baby

By: Christine Cox, The Choosy Mommy

My baby, Cam, is almost 7 months old now (actually he’ll be 7 months on Christmas Day!) He has come a long way since he was born 7 weeks early due to me having HELLP Syndrome. You can read more about his birth on HELLP Syndrome: Knowing About It Could Save Lives.

Cam spent 13 days in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU). These were the hardest 13 days my husband and I ever experienced. But they were the first 13 days of Cam’s life and we had to be strong for him.

Luckily we had a team of wonderful doctors and nurses caring for Cam when we couldn’t be there. We made sure we saw him every day but couldn’t be there 24/7 because my husband still had to run his business and I still had to care for my then 2 year old daughter, Capri, at home.

I learned a lot about premature babies in those 13 days. Those two weeks opened my eyes to a whole new world of experiences and firsts – especially as a parent of two children now. And this sensitive time in my life broke me because it was so hard to see the other tiny babies in the NICU just fighting for a chance to live…any parent’s fear. I realized that we take a lot of things for granted, like assuming that infants know how to eat, breathe, swallow and suck and to do some of those things simultaneously! I prayed for Cam to learn as fast as he could to do all of those things just so he could come home sooner but I knew he would learn at his own pace.

We all feel helpless in these kinds of situations because the baby’s fate is usually out of our control. But in case you or someone you know ever becomes a NICU parent, here are some tips for managing this experience.

Eat Healthy - At Choosy Kids, we talk about eating healthy all of the time, but at this point in Cam’s life, he was just learning HOW to eat. Since he was born at 33 weeks, he was supposed to just be learning how to do those things in the womb, but instead, he was forced to learn them on the outside. It was amazing to watch him learn how to do this with the help of medical equipment, his doctors and nurses, but I needed to help too. Eating was a big deal for him. For some reason, he wasn’t able to digest the formula they were giving to him in the beginning (I didn’t even start to pump yet because I was still recovering). But once he got breastmilk, his body adjusted and was able to digest it a lot better. I had to watch what I ate to ensure I was providing the best for him through my milk and still to this day have to watch my dairy intake, as it doesn’t agree with him. The most important thing a mom can do is to FEED the new infant, whether by breastmilk or formula, to establish an early loving relationship. But if you are breastfeeding, make sure you eat a healthy diet and up your calorie intake as suggested by your doctor to ensure you are sharing enough calories with your baby. Also remember to drink a ton of water – you’ll need it!

Just Breathe - Cam also had to learn to keep breathing while he was eating. There were a couple of times that he had bradycardias, or heart rate dips, while he was eating but we were lucky in that he pulled himself out of them. Some babies need to be touched to be reminded to breathe again. “Bradys,” as they call them in the NICU, are quite common. Unfortunately, every time a baby has one, he/she had to stay in our NICU another 5-7 days for monitoring (situation could vary depending on location). This was the hardest thing for me because every morning when I would call to check on him, I prayed he didn’t have a brady because I knew it would just add on extra days to his stay. As a parent, you need to remember to just breathe too. Babies can sense a lot of emotions so if parents are tense and stressed while visiting their NICU infant, they will sense those feelings. Take time throughout your day to just decompress, let out your feelings and just breathe deep.

Be Strong - As a parent, there is only so much I can do with a child in intensive care, but I knew I had to be strong for Cam, Capri, and my husband because they were just as much as part of this experience as I was.  To me, being strong meant looking forward to tomorrow as it was one more day closer to Cam coming home. Being strong meant not blaming myself for his early birth because it was out of my control. And finally, being strong meant just being there for him. Holding him, bathing him, even putting clothes on him…these seem like minor things, but he was so little so I had to be confident in my abilities and tell myself that I had the strength to do these things for him.

If you are currently a NICU parent, there are many resources available for you at the hospital. Talk to the nurses and social workers about your situation to ensure you are NICU strong. Choosy Kids also has a CD for babies called Our Special Time. The focus is on daily routines and active learning for early brain development and body awareness, which is perfect for all babies!

Additionally, if you are pregnant, learn more about HELLP Syndrome so you know the warning signs.

I’d love to hear your NICU strong story if you were in this situation. And even if you had an uncomplicated birth experience, how did you overcome any early issues with your new infants – whether it was eating, sleeping, etc. We are all parents so we are in this together!

About the Author: Christine Cox is the blog master and The Choosy Mommy for Choosy Kids. She has always had a passion for writing and is honored to contribute her work to this blog. Most of her writing inspiration comes from her daughter, Capri, who is fun-loving and full of energy, and newborn son Cam. Click here to learn more about Christine.

HELLP Syndrome: Knowing About It Could Save Lives

By: Christine Cox, The Choosy Mommy

On Monday, May 25, 2015, which happened to be Memorial Day, my husband and I welcomed baby #2, Cam, into our family. Much to our surprise, Cam arrived 7 weeks early at 33 weeks and 3 days gestational. As a second time mommy, I thought I had a lot of things figured out, but I learned so much from my premature peanut. Our experience was unlike my other pregnancy and delivery. My situation was rare and I hope that another mother, or even father, can learn something from my story.

The Thursday before Cam was born, I was in pain starting in the very early hours of the morning. My stomach just hurt. It was hard to describe the pain but it wasn’t contractions. I guess you could say the pain was a constant cramping feeling. That progressed to my back hurting to the point of feeling like I could not walk. I knew something was wrong so I promptly called my OB and went in for a checkup.

My blood pressure was a bit elevated but we figured it was just due to me stressing out. I had a bit of protein spilling into my urine, but it wasn’t enough to be concerned about at that time. The baby’s heart tones were fine according to the Doppler, but just to be sure, I was sent to the hospital for a non-stress test.

The non-stress test also showed that the baby was fine, and my blood pressure had declined by the time I got to the hospital and was hooked up to an IV. However, at that time the doctors were more concerned about my cervix changing than anything else. After an hour or so of monitoring, they thought I may have dilated a bit and since the hospital did not have the highest level of NICU that we would need at 32 weeks I had to be transported to another hospital.

I was hooked up and monitored at the new hospital for another hour. After nothing changed, they gave me some pain medicine and a steroid to help develop the baby’s lungs faster in case we did end up delivering early, and sent me home. I felt fine until Sunday evening.

My toddler and I spent most of Sunday in the pool. It was one of the first really nice weekends of the summer so we took full advantage of the weather. But by dinner time, I started to feel achy again. Not exactly the same pain that I had on Thursday, but similar. The stomach pain intensified (still not a contraction feeling) and I could not get comfortable. Plus my shoulder hurt, but I chalked that up to being in the pool all day and kind of ignored it.

The only time I felt fine was when I was soaking in a hot bath. At one point I did end up throwing up but I also didn’t really think much of that either since I was getting upset. But after taking 4 baths, I finally said to my husband that something isn’t right and we have to go to the hospital again (and by this time it was midnight!)

We dropped our toddler off at grandma’s house and went back to the first hospital. They did a blood test to find out that I had something that I have never heard of before---HELLP syndrome. I was told that we would have to deliver my baby ASAP. Yet again, I was transported to the second hospital since we were still too early in my pregnancy for the first hospital’s NICU.

This syndrome is rare which is why I felt it was important to share my story. According to WebMD, HELLP syndrome is a life-threatening liver disorder thought to be a type of severe preeclampsia. It is characterized by Hemolysis (destruction of red blood cells), Elevated Liver enzymes (which indicate liver damage), and Low Platelet count.

HELLP syndrome often occurs without warning and can be difficult to recognize. A lot of women believe they just have flu-like symptoms and ignore the pain and signs. It can occur without the signs of preeclampsia (which are usually a large increase in blood pressure and protein in the urine – like I had). WebMD states that symptoms of HELLP syndrome include:

• Headache.
• Vision problems.
• Pain in the upper right abdomen (liver).
• Shoulder, neck, and other upper body pain (this pain also originates in the liver).
• Fatigue.
• Nausea and vomiting.
• Seizure.

What you need to remember most from this is that HELLP syndrome can be life-threatening for both the mother and her unborn baby. A woman with symptoms of HELLP syndrome requires emergency medical treatment, hence why I was told we had to deliver ASAP, because it is the only known way to reverse the syndrome.

At 11:38 a.m., my son was delivered by cesarean due to him being breach. Born at a whopping 4 pounds, 14 ounces, Cam was breathing on his own and crying!

Cam spent 13 days in the NICU so he could grow and learn things outside of the womb that babies who remain inside the womb normally do (I’ll tell you about this in another blog). This was the most stressful 13 days my husband and I have had. In fact, my husband, a U.S. Marine, said that he would rather go back to Iraq than go through the 13 days in the NICU again!

Now a little more than 3 months old, Cam weighs in around 9 pounds, 7 ounces, He is a happy, healthy baby. My family and I are doing fine now and I haven’t had any further issues since delivery.

My story is important to read because it teaches expectant mothers, and fathers for that matter, to not ignore the signs your body is trying to tell you. Your body is a well-oiled machine but when something is wrong, it starts giving you signs to do something about it. Don’t ignore your body and get the help needed ASAP!

Have you heard of HELLP syndrome prior to reading this post? Do you have a rare pregnancy/delivery story that you’d like to share?

About the Author: Christine Cox is the blog master and The Choosy Mommy for Choosy Kids. She has always had a passion for writing and is honored to contribute her work to this blog. Most of her writing inspiration comes from her daughter, Capri, who is fun-loving and full of energy, and newborn son Cam. Click here to learn more about Christine.